drinking list numero dos. don't judge me.

i'll preface this with a sorry, but these some things just need to be said.

things that pissed me off tonight.

boots with heels.
-no offense to girls who wear them but they're really kind of ugly. stick with heels. trust me.

guys who wear dolce and gabana long sleeve rhinestone t-shirts.
-self explanatory, they have rhinestones

g-star raw.
-the jeans are ugly. sorry.

guys who wear sunglasses at night in bars.
-umm. who the hell do you think you are?

people who smoke hash in bars.
-seriously? go to retiro. they love that crap there.

expensive drinks.
-i had to pay four euros and fifty centimos for a beer tonight. that's like 8 dollars.

little dogs.
-i understand why you have them. you live in a tiny box apartment. but you're still a dick. you cater to every demand a rat on a leash has. you pick up it's poop. come on. and they yap.

bouncers.
-please, make fun of my shoes some more. threaten to not let me in because i don't wear the same leather dress shoes as everyone else. you are so cool. my vans are not. you are right.

spanish girl bartenders.
-you're cute, but don't pretend like you don't like overcharging me for drinks. i'm on to you.

spanish phone companies.
-you drain all my money very fast. very fast. i'm upset with you.

balloons.
-ok, some party i get it. but why do you pop so easily? you really scare the hell out of me every time that happens. please... go quietly into the night.

guys who ask for cigarettes.
-no. i don't have any. stop asking.

guys who ask for a lighter.
-no. i don't have one. stop asking.

people who dress like it's the north pole.
-by my estimate it's 60 degrees out. leave the gloves, overcoat, and beanie at home. you look like an eskimo.

guidos.
-self explanatory. get over yourself. quickly. the sooner the better.


ok that's all i have.

oh wait, this too.

if i'm half as awesome as this guy when i leave i'll be happy with myself.




love you all.